i know...

i know i cant push time but i want it to be tomorrow

i am so impatient.

i say im too busy for love but i want true love today
i say i want to be independent but im just too stubborn to admit i need anyone
i know im not fat but i want to lose 12 pounds

i love to hate and i hate to love
i want to love but i hate hugging

i think i need to be better than others but i know im fine the way i am
i think im not worth anything but i am to at least one person out there
i know i should be happy but i cry myself to sleep sometimes

i want to be an actress and i put on a show each day

im here.

i feel strong but i know im weak
i know im jealous of others but i have a great life
i open up to anyone but no one knows the real me
i try to figure out who i am but i dont know the real me

i realize all of this.

i know there are people here for me but i dont give them a chance
i know i give good advice but i never listen to myself
i know its easier to be happy but i put more effort into being mad

i know im sheltered but i know a lot

i have so many goals but i always make up excuses to work towards them
i have this front that i know im just afraid to lose
i know im an adult but inside im just a child

just a child

i know all of this.
















so what then?