its been so long. soooo long. so much has changed in my life since the last time i wrote on here. i moved to michigan. i let go of brian. (did i?) i found someone new, i think. i fell in love with kenny chesney, dierks bentley, and keith urban. i still drink alone. i still miss my purdue days.
i tried to blog about two weeks ago but my computer hated life and i couldnt. and i had so much to say too. but now i forgot about all that i wanted to say, and it lost its importance, so now im back here, just bored.
tonight i blog because i drink alone. i think i got my heart broken tonight. but thats just life. i am not going to discuss that issue, because it should not rule my life. however, i have nothing else to think or write about, so i guess this is it. after all....
Saturday, September 03, 2005
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
one of the best conversations....
one of the best conversations and i dont know why. but i had this one tonight with who else but amy j, and it just made me think:
VanSteph2: i miss college.
AmyDMB1: me too
VanSteph2: i was just thinking about like...id be at where else right now, or doing something more fun than this, or getting a den pop, or in the bum, or....
VanSteph2: and i just kinda want to go back, right now.
AmyDMB1: yep i know
AmyDMB1: we cant though
AmyDMB1: and anyway, its not the same as we remember you know
AmyDMB1: i always think i miss it but if i was back there, it wouldnt be fun
AmyDMB1: all my friends are gone
VanSteph2: true...i guess i miss college when it was normall...
VanSteph2: like i miss college when we were all there.
VanSteph2: like...i dont miss purdue...i mean i do...but i guess its more right to say i miss "college" or the "college years"
VanSteph2: than to say "i miss purdue"
AmyDMB1: yeah i know
VanSteph2: bc i can always go back there, but it will never be the same as how i remember it.
AmyDMB1: i regret graduating
VanSteph2: me too.
VanSteph2: i want it to be like the year 2002
VanSteph2: or even 2003
VanSteph2: 2003 is better. haha
VanSteph2: i wasnt with **** then.
AmyDMB1: yeah dang
AmyDMB1: i wish we could go back
VanSteph2: me too.
VanSteph2: time travel, haha.
VanSteph2: and even though its annoying, i miss agd too.
VanSteph2: it was a good time.
VanSteph2: and the bus, and going out. hahaha, even when werent 21...and just went to apt./house parties.lol
AmyDMB1: haha yep
this just made me think, how much i truly miss college. i wish i could go back in time, literally, and do it all over again. if i could...i wouldnt change a thing either. but if i could change a few things...i know what they would be.... ;)
VanSteph2: i miss college.
AmyDMB1: me too
VanSteph2: i was just thinking about like...id be at where else right now, or doing something more fun than this, or getting a den pop, or in the bum, or....
VanSteph2: and i just kinda want to go back, right now.
AmyDMB1: yep i know
AmyDMB1: we cant though
AmyDMB1: and anyway, its not the same as we remember you know
AmyDMB1: i always think i miss it but if i was back there, it wouldnt be fun
AmyDMB1: all my friends are gone
VanSteph2: true...i guess i miss college when it was normall...
VanSteph2: like i miss college when we were all there.
VanSteph2: like...i dont miss purdue...i mean i do...but i guess its more right to say i miss "college" or the "college years"
VanSteph2: than to say "i miss purdue"
AmyDMB1: yeah i know
VanSteph2: bc i can always go back there, but it will never be the same as how i remember it.
AmyDMB1: i regret graduating
VanSteph2: me too.
VanSteph2: i want it to be like the year 2002
VanSteph2: or even 2003
VanSteph2: 2003 is better. haha
VanSteph2: i wasnt with **** then.
AmyDMB1: yeah dang
AmyDMB1: i wish we could go back
VanSteph2: me too.
VanSteph2: time travel, haha.
VanSteph2: and even though its annoying, i miss agd too.
VanSteph2: it was a good time.
VanSteph2: and the bus, and going out. hahaha, even when werent 21...and just went to apt./house parties.lol
AmyDMB1: haha yep
this just made me think, how much i truly miss college. i wish i could go back in time, literally, and do it all over again. if i could...i wouldnt change a thing either. but if i could change a few things...i know what they would be.... ;)
Saturday, February 19, 2005
there are those
there are those that you love. and then there are those that you love.
there are those that you love at the time, and there are those that you love forever. there are those that you love at the moment, and there are those that you love for an eternity. there are those that you love when you are young, and there are those that you want to love when you are old. there are those that you love when you are childish, and there are those that you love and want to grow old with. there are those that you will always love, and there are those that you will always love until you die and afterwards. there are those you love and dream about being with, and there are those you dream about being in love with. there are those that you know will make you happy, and there are those who already do. there are those who you once loved, and there are those who you still do. there are those who you were once in love with, and there are those who you will always be in love with. there are those who loved you and those who still do. there are those who loved you at one time and always will. there are those who you think about each day, and there are those who think about you each day. there are those who you think about each day that you are in love with, and there are those who you think about each day that you think you are in love. there are those who touched your life once, and there are those who will touch your life forever. there are those who you cant be without, and there are those who cant be without you. there are those who you choose to have to live without, and there are those who choose to live without you. there are those who you know you are meant to be together, and there are those who know the same. there are those who you think you are meant to be together, and there are those who prove you wrong. there are those who you will find again one day, and there are those who you already lost. there are those who you will find one day, and there are those who are also looking for you. there are those whose love you know is so wrong, and there are those whose love you know is so right. there are those that care about the rightness of the love, and there are those that care more about the wrongness. there are those whose love is forever, and there is those whose love is continously. there are those who love you, and there are those who love you more. there are those who you love, and there are those who you love more. there are those that you want to be with, and there are those who you know you can be with. there are those who you want to be with, and there are those who you choose to be with. there are those who you want to be with, and there are those who want you back. there are those who you love and want to be with, and there are those who you love and cant be with you. there is that one person who loves you, and there is that one person back who you love back.
there are those that you love at the time, and there are those that you love forever. there are those that you love at the moment, and there are those that you love for an eternity. there are those that you love when you are young, and there are those that you want to love when you are old. there are those that you love when you are childish, and there are those that you love and want to grow old with. there are those that you will always love, and there are those that you will always love until you die and afterwards. there are those you love and dream about being with, and there are those you dream about being in love with. there are those that you know will make you happy, and there are those who already do. there are those who you once loved, and there are those who you still do. there are those who you were once in love with, and there are those who you will always be in love with. there are those who loved you and those who still do. there are those who loved you at one time and always will. there are those who you think about each day, and there are those who think about you each day. there are those who you think about each day that you are in love with, and there are those who you think about each day that you think you are in love. there are those who touched your life once, and there are those who will touch your life forever. there are those who you cant be without, and there are those who cant be without you. there are those who you choose to have to live without, and there are those who choose to live without you. there are those who you know you are meant to be together, and there are those who know the same. there are those who you think you are meant to be together, and there are those who prove you wrong. there are those who you will find again one day, and there are those who you already lost. there are those who you will find one day, and there are those who are also looking for you. there are those whose love you know is so wrong, and there are those whose love you know is so right. there are those that care about the rightness of the love, and there are those that care more about the wrongness. there are those whose love is forever, and there is those whose love is continously. there are those who love you, and there are those who love you more. there are those who you love, and there are those who you love more. there are those that you want to be with, and there are those who you know you can be with. there are those who you want to be with, and there are those who you choose to be with. there are those who you want to be with, and there are those who want you back. there are those who you love and want to be with, and there are those who you love and cant be with you. there is that one person who loves you, and there is that one person back who you love back.
Monday, February 14, 2005
quote
someone once wrote this quote for me: i believe it was originally said/written by H.D. Thoreau:
"Not til we are lost, in other words, not til we have lost the world, do we begin to find ourselves, and realize where we are and the value of our relationships."
now i think the "real" quote is a bit different. however, the context in which this was said to me was a bit strange. regardless, i am still coming to terms with what this quote means. i mean, i know what it means, but i am searching for some other hidden meaning. i feel as though i am struggling to get something else out of this, rather than just the following:
we cannot really and truly figure out who we are as a person [both to ourselves and others], and we cannot realize how important our relationships with others are and how much they are worth, until we first lose it all [not til we have lost the world...everything that has meaning to us. or not til the world loses us...]
its like, "you dont know what youve got til its gone" type of saying. and unless i really cant find the other meaning, i feel as though this quote sucks. i mean, i could have told you this!! dont we all know that REALLY knowing...who we are, or just anything...can only TRULY be found when we start from ground zero?
"Not til we are lost, in other words, not til we have lost the world, do we begin to find ourselves, and realize where we are and the value of our relationships."
now i think the "real" quote is a bit different. however, the context in which this was said to me was a bit strange. regardless, i am still coming to terms with what this quote means. i mean, i know what it means, but i am searching for some other hidden meaning. i feel as though i am struggling to get something else out of this, rather than just the following:
we cannot really and truly figure out who we are as a person [both to ourselves and others], and we cannot realize how important our relationships with others are and how much they are worth, until we first lose it all [not til we have lost the world...everything that has meaning to us. or not til the world loses us...]
its like, "you dont know what youve got til its gone" type of saying. and unless i really cant find the other meaning, i feel as though this quote sucks. i mean, i could have told you this!! dont we all know that REALLY knowing...who we are, or just anything...can only TRULY be found when we start from ground zero?
what is it about spring?
february is almost over already. what happened to it? march is marching right down street and before we know it, i will be writing about how much i love the first warm rain in spring.
what is it about spring?
what is it about the changing of seasons? what is it about spring that we, or at least i, love so much. and i know others agree with me. what is it about spring that makes us love? what is it about spring that makes you want to have a picnic and go on walks? what is it about spring that makes you want to be outside? what is it about spring that makes you want to be in love?
spring makes me want to go back to high school. it makes me want to re-live those days in highschool...baseball season, soccer, spring in highschool was almost the most fun. spring makes me want to go back in time.
why is it that alcohol has to be an influence to make me want to write on this blogger shit? the last um....10 posts probably have all been me under some sort of influence. how sad. i feel like none of these make any sense. they do to me at least in my head. whatever, i really dont care. i have not once went back to even read these. maybe i did once. but so nowadays, i dont even know what i had said last month, or the month before.
someone told me that my blogs are histarical and pathetic. in fact, i think i can quote directly; "your blogs are the most pathetic thing i have ever seen." and its so funny, because i really didnt care what s/he thought. the best part, was that s/he told me this out of nowhere, like i had asked about it, and another great fact was that s/he read all of them before s/he was able to tell me that, so i got the last laugh at that one. thanks for taking the time to read them at least. who says that anyways? out of nowhere? the last best part is that s/he read them all to begin with, without any force or asking of, and even though s/he thought they were so stupid, s/he will more than likely read this blog and see this shout-out specifically pointed out to her/him, and know that i am talking about him/her. hahaha. cracks me up.
on another note...do people just randomly stalk others on this blog shit? because i have a comment on one i guess, from someone i dont have any relation to, or even know...at all. so who does that? who has nothing else to do, than to look up random peoples' blogs and respond? i think its rather creepy. i really dont care if anyone looks at this, but i especially dont care if people respond. and while i guess its a bit flattering that someone took the time to read what i had to say, and i appreciate it, i think i have done a good job of really NOT advertising this to people. not that i dont want others to read it, but i dont want people just being bored and reading this...people i dont know. why? its creepy. dont you have something else to do? at least if i tell my friends about it and people who i know read it, thats one thing. but not randoms. thats creepy. i know i dont sit around and search strangers' blogs. if you do, cool. thats your thing, but it certainly isnt mine. not that im better than you, but come on...honestly...find something else to do with your life.
im not bitter. im really not. in fact im really happy lately. extremely happy actually. i have been finding a new way to appreciate life. in all forms. thats something else i will have to write about some other time im drunk. lets just put it like this: i have come to appreciate people. people of all forms, races, colors, ages, religions, etc. i love people. i come to realize that my life is my life. i believe in god, and destiny, and fate, all at the same time. i believe that i have a role and can play a part in that life, destiny, and fate. i believe in myself and what i can do. i believe in others...even when they suck. i believe in others when they dont know what they are talking about, but are sure that they do. because they probably believe in themselves. i believe in people that dont know other people but hurt them anyways--because i have seen it and felt it. i believe in the strength that i have. i believe that you can love more than one person throughout life. and sometimes those loves may overlap and sometimes they will clash. sometimes love is hurtful. but i do believe that you should only have one BEST love. i believe that you can do anything you really want to do, but it will be hard and strenuous, and annoying. i believe that i will be on stage before i know it. i believe that my screenplay will be amazing. i believe that someday i will be a really awesome teacher. i believe that life is great. this might be hell on earth, but at least we need to make the best of it. i believe that we can all make a difference. i believe that im making a lot of cliches and sounding like an idiot, but im drunk so its fine. but its these small things that i believe in that make my life a whole lot better. these are the things that make me happy. these are the things that have made my life happy. they have made me a lot happier. my friends make me happy. my "friends" who are my real friends. and even those who are just acquaintances. i am happy. i am happy in love. i am happy in life. i am not happy in myself, but thats once again another blog waiting to be written... but i am happy. for the most part.
what is it about spring?
what is it about the changing of seasons? what is it about spring that we, or at least i, love so much. and i know others agree with me. what is it about spring that makes us love? what is it about spring that makes you want to have a picnic and go on walks? what is it about spring that makes you want to be outside? what is it about spring that makes you want to be in love?
spring makes me want to go back to high school. it makes me want to re-live those days in highschool...baseball season, soccer, spring in highschool was almost the most fun. spring makes me want to go back in time.
why is it that alcohol has to be an influence to make me want to write on this blogger shit? the last um....10 posts probably have all been me under some sort of influence. how sad. i feel like none of these make any sense. they do to me at least in my head. whatever, i really dont care. i have not once went back to even read these. maybe i did once. but so nowadays, i dont even know what i had said last month, or the month before.
someone told me that my blogs are histarical and pathetic. in fact, i think i can quote directly; "your blogs are the most pathetic thing i have ever seen." and its so funny, because i really didnt care what s/he thought. the best part, was that s/he told me this out of nowhere, like i had asked about it, and another great fact was that s/he read all of them before s/he was able to tell me that, so i got the last laugh at that one. thanks for taking the time to read them at least. who says that anyways? out of nowhere? the last best part is that s/he read them all to begin with, without any force or asking of, and even though s/he thought they were so stupid, s/he will more than likely read this blog and see this shout-out specifically pointed out to her/him, and know that i am talking about him/her. hahaha. cracks me up.
on another note...do people just randomly stalk others on this blog shit? because i have a comment on one i guess, from someone i dont have any relation to, or even know...at all. so who does that? who has nothing else to do, than to look up random peoples' blogs and respond? i think its rather creepy. i really dont care if anyone looks at this, but i especially dont care if people respond. and while i guess its a bit flattering that someone took the time to read what i had to say, and i appreciate it, i think i have done a good job of really NOT advertising this to people. not that i dont want others to read it, but i dont want people just being bored and reading this...people i dont know. why? its creepy. dont you have something else to do? at least if i tell my friends about it and people who i know read it, thats one thing. but not randoms. thats creepy. i know i dont sit around and search strangers' blogs. if you do, cool. thats your thing, but it certainly isnt mine. not that im better than you, but come on...honestly...find something else to do with your life.
im not bitter. im really not. in fact im really happy lately. extremely happy actually. i have been finding a new way to appreciate life. in all forms. thats something else i will have to write about some other time im drunk. lets just put it like this: i have come to appreciate people. people of all forms, races, colors, ages, religions, etc. i love people. i come to realize that my life is my life. i believe in god, and destiny, and fate, all at the same time. i believe that i have a role and can play a part in that life, destiny, and fate. i believe in myself and what i can do. i believe in others...even when they suck. i believe in others when they dont know what they are talking about, but are sure that they do. because they probably believe in themselves. i believe in people that dont know other people but hurt them anyways--because i have seen it and felt it. i believe in the strength that i have. i believe that you can love more than one person throughout life. and sometimes those loves may overlap and sometimes they will clash. sometimes love is hurtful. but i do believe that you should only have one BEST love. i believe that you can do anything you really want to do, but it will be hard and strenuous, and annoying. i believe that i will be on stage before i know it. i believe that my screenplay will be amazing. i believe that someday i will be a really awesome teacher. i believe that life is great. this might be hell on earth, but at least we need to make the best of it. i believe that we can all make a difference. i believe that im making a lot of cliches and sounding like an idiot, but im drunk so its fine. but its these small things that i believe in that make my life a whole lot better. these are the things that make me happy. these are the things that have made my life happy. they have made me a lot happier. my friends make me happy. my "friends" who are my real friends. and even those who are just acquaintances. i am happy. i am happy in love. i am happy in life. i am not happy in myself, but thats once again another blog waiting to be written... but i am happy. for the most part.
Friday, January 28, 2005
"1,000 THINGS" to talk about when you live alone.
what a lovely song:
words & music by jason mraz
'I'm overjoyed and over loved and feeling lucky
like a little boy who's hiding under covers
and looking to discover any way to play the part inside his darkened cave
well the meaning of life it starts at the nightlight
close your eyes and hope to see mine
well I've seen a thousand things in one place
but I stopped my counting when I saw your face
erasing memory I feel as though I've never seen a face before
until I saw your eyes smiling back at me thru my tears
I've been counting all these years
Now suddenly the thousand things I've seen were
nothing more than dreams of you and me
you and me quietly at a stand still
fortunately you will kiss me and I'll kiss you back
fact of the matter of is that I don't know what the latter is
that I always wanted to kiss you but
I always wanted to run from you
Because I always wanted to miss you
And that I've always wanted to come for you
So... how do you do?
so here i am...once again...getting drunk alone. yet after 1/2 a bottle, i still find myself amazingly sober. extremely sober.
by myself. with captain morgan. who else would i be with?!
im watching my Live DVD Jason Mraz in concert and that song was playing as i decided to go ahead and "blog." this is my life now that i live alone. i sit here here, no one to know, drink when i can and want to, and watch good DVD's and want to write. so here i am....still alone. but not i guess you could count that i am with 2 other guys: the captain and jason.
so this is what life is like when you live alone. i will sum it up for you all who have yet to venture out... [does it matter that i just hit replay for the 4th time of this song? i absolutely love this song live by mraz.] getting back to living alone:
1. you are alone. if you are brave enough and strong enough to venture to a different state where the only person you know [that calls you and wants to hang out and is not too busy for you] is one hour away, then you have to learn to entertain yourself without anyone else around. this can be very healing in my eyes. i have time to walk around naked if i wanted to, i have time to sit here and watch what i want to watch and drink what i want to drink, and replay the same song for the 5th time. its great. i can do whatever it is i want. at the same time, you are alone. all the time. except for those times with the captain and jason mraz--you are by yourself. its sad. its lonely. going from something you took for granted--knowing over 300 people at a campus to knowing NO ONE, is hard. i cant walk down the small campus here and see people i live with or who i know. i cant walk into the bars and know everyone in there....i cant walk into a bar. i can, but it would be alone, and who wants to do that? so face it: living alone in a new state = being alone.
2. its scary. besides not knowing anyone, you may get a scary, creepy man knocking at your door asking for money. and then later find out that hes been to other girls' apartments. creepy.
3. its money. ugh. paying bills, loans, gas, food, it sucks. [after the 6th time of playing this same song, i finally decided to change it....]
4. its growing up. i am the first one out of all of my friends [from back home] who has moved out on her own...to a different state...who is paying her own bills, tuition, loans, etc. and no one else seems to care and that is fine with me. i am learning and accepting this new concept of independence. but that sucks too.
5. its cooking, cleaning, doing everything on your own. ugh....[remember when you wanted your parents to leave you alone and treat you like an adult...well now i wish they would just treat me like a 6 year old.]
6. its freedom yet lock down. freedom = i can do whatever i want anytime of the day/night. lock down= i dont know anyone to do anything with. hahaha.
i cant think of anything else. the 1/2 bottle of captain is hitting me now and i dont know what else to write. i know i wanted to say something that just happened to slip my mind and its really going to eat at me and piss me off. however....i will come back with it i know. as for now....well i need to go refill and find something else to do alone. catch ya later.
words & music by jason mraz
'I'm overjoyed and over loved and feeling lucky
like a little boy who's hiding under covers
and looking to discover any way to play the part inside his darkened cave
well the meaning of life it starts at the nightlight
close your eyes and hope to see mine
well I've seen a thousand things in one place
but I stopped my counting when I saw your face
erasing memory I feel as though I've never seen a face before
until I saw your eyes smiling back at me thru my tears
I've been counting all these years
Now suddenly the thousand things I've seen were
nothing more than dreams of you and me
you and me quietly at a stand still
fortunately you will kiss me and I'll kiss you back
fact of the matter of is that I don't know what the latter is
that I always wanted to kiss you but
I always wanted to run from you
Because I always wanted to miss you
And that I've always wanted to come for you
So... how do you do?
so here i am...once again...getting drunk alone. yet after 1/2 a bottle, i still find myself amazingly sober. extremely sober.
by myself. with captain morgan. who else would i be with?!
im watching my Live DVD Jason Mraz in concert and that song was playing as i decided to go ahead and "blog." this is my life now that i live alone. i sit here here, no one to know, drink when i can and want to, and watch good DVD's and want to write. so here i am....still alone. but not i guess you could count that i am with 2 other guys: the captain and jason.
so this is what life is like when you live alone. i will sum it up for you all who have yet to venture out... [does it matter that i just hit replay for the 4th time of this song? i absolutely love this song live by mraz.] getting back to living alone:
1. you are alone. if you are brave enough and strong enough to venture to a different state where the only person you know [that calls you and wants to hang out and is not too busy for you] is one hour away, then you have to learn to entertain yourself without anyone else around. this can be very healing in my eyes. i have time to walk around naked if i wanted to, i have time to sit here and watch what i want to watch and drink what i want to drink, and replay the same song for the 5th time. its great. i can do whatever it is i want. at the same time, you are alone. all the time. except for those times with the captain and jason mraz--you are by yourself. its sad. its lonely. going from something you took for granted--knowing over 300 people at a campus to knowing NO ONE, is hard. i cant walk down the small campus here and see people i live with or who i know. i cant walk into the bars and know everyone in there....i cant walk into a bar. i can, but it would be alone, and who wants to do that? so face it: living alone in a new state = being alone.
2. its scary. besides not knowing anyone, you may get a scary, creepy man knocking at your door asking for money. and then later find out that hes been to other girls' apartments. creepy.
3. its money. ugh. paying bills, loans, gas, food, it sucks. [after the 6th time of playing this same song, i finally decided to change it....]
4. its growing up. i am the first one out of all of my friends [from back home] who has moved out on her own...to a different state...who is paying her own bills, tuition, loans, etc. and no one else seems to care and that is fine with me. i am learning and accepting this new concept of independence. but that sucks too.
5. its cooking, cleaning, doing everything on your own. ugh....[remember when you wanted your parents to leave you alone and treat you like an adult...well now i wish they would just treat me like a 6 year old.]
6. its freedom yet lock down. freedom = i can do whatever i want anytime of the day/night. lock down= i dont know anyone to do anything with. hahaha.
i cant think of anything else. the 1/2 bottle of captain is hitting me now and i dont know what else to write. i know i wanted to say something that just happened to slip my mind and its really going to eat at me and piss me off. however....i will come back with it i know. as for now....well i need to go refill and find something else to do alone. catch ya later.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
if i dont love you...
what would you think if someone said this to you:
"if i dont love you as a friend, i love you as a person."
huh?! what does that mean? they dont love you...you are not their friend, but you are still a good person? so even though you are a good person, that person doesnt like you as a friend? it doesnt make sense to me. why wouldnt someone want to be "friends" with a nice "person?"
is that a compliment? you may not be a friend, but you are still a good person? is that an insult? youre not my friend, but youre still a good person?
huh?
does it make a difference if one of your best friends said it? if it was the last thing they said before they hung up phone: "if i dont love you as a friend, i love you as a person" and then said "ill talk to you soon, bye."
this happened to me tonight, and i sat there after the phone went dead....with my eyes looking extremely confused--eyebrows all hunched up--going "what? what the hell was that? what did they just say?" who says that? what the hell does it even mean? wierd.
"if i dont love you as my friend, i love you as a person." haha, what an ass. one of my best friends tells me that...so i guess im not really their friend, but at least i have the fact that im loved as a person going for me huh? what the hell...im still questioning this.....
"if i dont love you as a friend, i love you as a person."
huh?! what does that mean? they dont love you...you are not their friend, but you are still a good person? so even though you are a good person, that person doesnt like you as a friend? it doesnt make sense to me. why wouldnt someone want to be "friends" with a nice "person?"
is that a compliment? you may not be a friend, but you are still a good person? is that an insult? youre not my friend, but youre still a good person?
huh?
does it make a difference if one of your best friends said it? if it was the last thing they said before they hung up phone: "if i dont love you as a friend, i love you as a person" and then said "ill talk to you soon, bye."
this happened to me tonight, and i sat there after the phone went dead....with my eyes looking extremely confused--eyebrows all hunched up--going "what? what the hell was that? what did they just say?" who says that? what the hell does it even mean? wierd.
"if i dont love you as my friend, i love you as a person." haha, what an ass. one of my best friends tells me that...so i guess im not really their friend, but at least i have the fact that im loved as a person going for me huh? what the hell...im still questioning this.....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
